Okay, admit it, you are guilty of talking about people behind their back. Honestly, who isn't? I would be a hypocrite to say that I never partake in such an activity, and I think we would all be lying to ourselves if we said we never spoke one negative thing about another person when they were not around.
Growing up, I tried to live by not saying anything about a person unless I was willing to say it to their face. Essentially, it makes perfect sense because if something negative that I may have said got back to the person I said it about, I can just stand my ground about what I said before if this person confronts me. However, I have found this to be an incredibly hard thing to live by because I am a person who likes to get things off my chest. And realistically, do I really need to tell a person that they upset me or annoyed me about something every time? Plus I think you all know the end result of this scenario. We lose a friend, we lose respect of that person, and more than likely, we probably lose respect from the person we said it to.
I think that gossip is one of the most hurtful things in the world which is why I feel so compelled to blog about this topic. The simple solution could be to just never talk about a person in a negative way. People are not going to go along with this. Maybe for you it can be as simple as what I mentioned above and not saying anything that you would not say to a person's face. Realistically, this is not that easy for everyone. If you still feel the need to talk about others in a negative way, consider these two things before you do it again.
First, if you really feel the need to talk bad about other people, why not do it only with the people that you know it will not extend any further? Have those one or two friends that you can talk to where you know that they will not tell another person. I think it is important to have people in your life you can have confidence in. This is a healthier option for everyone involved. You can get things off your chest and no one gets hurt in the process. Is this perfect? No, but it is better than running your mouth around anyone and everyone. Do not be a person that feels better by putting other people down. I will be honest, I think this is one of the most pathetic qualities anyone can have. Do not be a person that consistently talks negative about others. It is just not a positive way to live your life.
My second way of dealing with this is a little different. Do you ever take the time to think about why you do not like another person? Okay, do you have that reason in mind? Now, have you ever taken the time to try and understand why a person might act the way they do? Maybe someone always feels the need to control a situation and it absolutely drives you crazy whenever you have to work with that person. There is a possibility that this person may have had a life experience that you do not know about which is why they act controlling. It could be something so traumatic that as a result, they control things to mentally put themselves at ease. This may seem irrational, but how do you know that this is not the case? You never truly know what a person may have been through in life. Experiences shape us into the person we are, but some experiences are not worth sharing to just anyone.
My whole point with all of this is that we need to think twice before talking about others. It is hurtful to the victim if the things said get back to them through another source. It all comes down to what we are told when we are children: if you do not have anything nice to say, do not say it all. Our lives could be so much better if we live by this because I feel it holds a lot of value in today's world.
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